The Myth of Bubble Baths

I recently moved house and our new house doesn’t have a bath tub. So, no more relaxing candle-lit bubble baths with essential oils and a glass of wine…

Good! I never was a big fan.

Bubble baths are certainly not at the top of my list of self-care activities. I think the last time I took a bath, someone came to the door and the dogs wouldn’t stop barking. I left the bathroom three times, and by the end, I was more stressed than when I went in.

So why does self-care keep showing up in my mind as a picture of doing something relaxing, soothing, or any other activity you’d see in a glossy wellness ad?

Here’s the truth: self-care isn’t about the activity. It’s about the impact it has on you. And with that in mind, this edition of my newsletter is about busting some of the most common myths around self-care.

Myth 1: Self-care is indulgent

The reality: self-care is maintenance, not luxury. Think about it like charging your phone or filling your car with fuel — it’s what keeps you running. Without it, you burn out, and often the people around you feel the effects too.

Myth 2: Self-care has to take hours

The reality: some of the best forms of self-care take minutes. A deep breath. A short walk outside. Saying no to something that drains you. Checking in with your feelings before diving into the next task. These are the everyday habits that build resilience far more than a spa day once a year.

Myth 3: Self-care is “girly”

Really? Yes, I have heard this being said multiple times. The reality: sleep, movement, boundaries, and mental health care are human needs, not female-only luxuries. The stigma of self-care being “soft” or “feminine” has held too many people back from practices that make them stronger, clearer, and healthier. The truth: brushing your teeth and protecting your time aren’t “girly” — they’re survival.

Here’s a simple way to test whether what you’re doing counts as true self-care:

“Do I feel more equipped to face life after this?”

If the answer is yes, that’s genuine self-care. If the answer is no, it might have been distraction (which is okay sometimes too, but it won’t sustain you).

This week, I’d love you to reflect on:

• What does self-care really look like for you?

• Which small practices leave you feeling more grounded, present, and ready?

• And where might you be chasing the “bubble bath” version of care when what you really need is rest, boundaries, or support?

Because real self-care isn’t glamorous. But it’s powerful.

This is me in one of my moments of self-care: watching Frankie enjoying her time rolling in something (who knows what exactly?). She’s not bothered by the lack of a bathtub either by the way, little does she know she’s going in the shower when we get home… 

Frankie nominating herself for a shower...